The Grand Canyon is but a mere trickle through lowly pebbles in comparison to how much I hate being told what to do. The poem below perhaps captures the greatest representation currently encountered, but the irritation can equally extend to being told how I felt about something; especially when the feeling in question is one I don’t particularly care for.

A recent example occurred after happening to see some musicians at a local pub; one in particular I’d thought quite outstanding and the next day commented on their social media post about the gig to say so. Their reply: ‘Glad you had a nice time.’

Firstly, I made no reference whatsoever in the comment to the sort of time had, and the assumption it had been ‘nice’ I took as a grossly insulting comment on my ability to be objective about someone’s artistic ability regardless of personal mood/circumstances; I could’ve been there after a funeral for all they knew!

Secondly . . . ‘nice’? A cup of tea is nice; at least one certainly hopes it is. But beyond making tea I’ve never done anything in the hope it will be ‘nice’. Whatever I do is in anticipation of it being amazing, utterly fantastic and/or awesome. When not specifically referring to tea, ‘nice’ is so uninspiring and middle of the road as to default to ‘meh’. And while I know this might be a personal gripe, what sort of artist goes around wishing no more than to leave a ‘nice’ impression on people? Obviously to leave a nice impression is better than a bad one, but it’s hardly reaching for the stars; consider:

No world tour has ever been advertised along the lines of: ‘Come and see so-and-so live in concert, it’s going to be nice.’ And quite frankly Tony the Tiger would sound bloody ridiculous calling out, ‘They’re nnnnnice!’

I rest my case, m’lord.

With thanks to the cottonbro studio for use of the header image.

I hate when
An introduction to something
Or the delivery of food
To the table
By an establishment’s staff
Is finished with
Enjoy!
Even more so
When it’s the one word
Comment in reply
To a post announcing
Being about to watch
A film
Or having just booked
A holiday
Something like that
Don’t!
Tell me
What to do
I’ll ‘enjoy!’ if I want to
In which vein
I can’t do the same
Having but myself to blame
For having to wish
That instead
You’ll bon appétit this poem
As much as I
Bon appétited
Writing it

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