Poetry on the subject of being disturbed when reading; an interactive post in that for a fee of $50 plus travelling and expenses I’ll come round your house and interrupt you while reading it for the artistic irony of doing so (so don’t start reading yet if intending to purchase that option, and if not for yourself then why not as a lovely gift for a loved one or much cherished friend; in which case, read away!).

With thanks to Radu Florin for use of header image (licensing).

Why would you
Think I’d want to
Come join
When I’m sat here
Happily reading a book
My personal choice in style
Over angrily doing so
We didn’t arrange to meet
In fact
Now that I think of it
You didn’t respond to my last DM
Or even give a like or lol
To any recent comment
On your plethora of posts
And you certainly wasn’t
In the bookshop with me
When I picked it out
With excitement and anticipation
For what might be contained
Within pages freshly ink branded
Where were you
When I took it home
Holding it on the bus
Where were you
When I read the first chapter
That very same night
Then started the second
Only to fall asleep
Not because the book was boring
Ooh-la-la
Au contraire!
But because I was tired
Should’ve gone straight to sleep
But couldn’t resist
So was drawn on
Into a swirling mist
Of words floating on the page
As an ever closing down mind
Equally fought
To still decipherer
Line after line
Take yet another tantalising step
Into this new world
That you were most certainly
Not in
So I ask again
Where were you
Through the drama and anguish
Of chapters three and four
The audible gasps
At some of the decisions made
By characters in chapter five
Where were you
As their consequence simmered
Beneath the surface
Of the steamy secondary love story
Waiting to come to a boil
And now
As I sit here with things
About to reach glorious climax
You suddenly call to me
Hey! What you reading? Come join
Not just wanting in
But wanting me to
Bring it over too
Big bulging eyes on nothing but
A big fat slice of the orgasm cake
Well
Guess what, greedy guts
Uh-uh, no way
I’m closing the pages
Firmly on the free bookmark
That came with it
To go find another
Pub, wine bar, coffee shop, bistro,
Train carriage, park bench, tandem bicycle,
Pagoda in Venice, halfway up Everest 
Wherever it is that to this point
You’ve imagined this exchange taking place
While you
While you can stay right there
Desperately hoping
To know someone else
Reading the book
That looked so engrossing

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